In Rocky 3 Thunderlips (see left) made the fairly bold claim tha he was 'The Ultimate Male'. That was briefly before Sly put him in his place...Still, whether he was or not, chances are that Hulk Hogan is no longer quite the Ultimate Male and that's why we at The Biomatrix have decided to begin the hunt for a new king... The Ultimate MAN.
Based on the Man Points laws set down by Adam Sinicki and Nathan Wallace (2007) one man must stand out above all others. Think it could be you? If you think you have what it takes then you could find yourself officially crowned 'Ultimate Man 2009' by April 10 on The-Biomatrix.Net, this blog and the Man Points group on Facebook. You will be the man that all other men defer to, a living legend... like the Fonz, or Chuck Norris, or Elvis (technically a dead legend...). And on top of that you'll win a free signed copy of the book Project Superman, currently going for £16.68 (check it out here: http://stores.lulu.com/nqr) and a laminated certificate proving your status as Ultimate Man. Oh and of course, 1,000,000,000 Man Points (you get 10 just for entering).
All you have to do is head on over to the Biomatrix forum (http://www.the-biomatrix.net/forum.htm) and reply to the thread named 'Ultaimte MAN Competition'. Here you must write 100-500 words on why you think you should be crowned the Ultimate Man 2009. Make sure to include your e-mail and if you've won we'll get in touch for more details. Look around the site (www.the-biomatrix.net) a bit first and the Facebook group to get some inspiration. Remember, these are some things that will earn you Man Points:
• Completing a Rocky Marathon: +50
• Punching someone: + 2 points
• Punching someone much bigger than you: + 5 points
• Head-butting someone: + 7 points
• Playing a riff on an electric guitar: + 3
• Downing a drink: + 3 points
• Running a mile: + 8 points
• Downing petrol: + 7 points
• Climbing something high: + 5
• Shouting really loud and beating your chest: + 2
• Wrestling a lion: + 20
• Setting fire to some money: + 5
• Smoking a cigar: + 2
• Swallowing a live snake: + 30
• Sex: + 8 points
• Swearing: + 1
• Swearing at your boss: + 4
• Swearing at the queen: + 10
• Being aloof: + 2
• 3-some(two girls): + 30 points
• Visiting the-biomatrix.net: + 5
• Lifting something really heavy: + 5
• Doing a massive shit: + 3
• Pushing yourself to the limit! + 9
• Exploding something: + 20
• Winning any kind of competition: +5
• Being on fire and not even caring: + 30
• Driving: + 2
• Riding a motor bike: + 3
• Being involved in a high-speed car chase: + 20
• Punching through a steel-enforced brick wall: + 50
• Being topless: + 1
• Eating raw eggs: + 1
• Eating raw meat: + 2
• Watching action films: + 2
• Not revising for an exam: +2
• Completing a centurion or a 24 can challenge: +15
• Starting a fight with Chuck Norris: +4,000
• Climbing a mountain: +100
• Drinking Stella: +10
• Playing rugby: + 5
• Drinking till you throw up then continuing: + 5 (only if you drink more than 15 pints before you laugh at the carpet.)
• Getting banned for life from a club: +5
• Trying to get back in 5 mins later: + 2
• Wearing Brut: + 2
• Driving with your eyes close: + 8
• Walking out of an explosion unharmed: + 25
• Melting stuff: + 3
• Starting a fight with Jack Bauer: +50
• Completing the Tough Guy Challenge: +100
• Hunting + 10
• Winning a fight with Chuck Norris: + 1,000,000,000 (Because its impossible)
• Being able to pop open a bra by looking at it + 50
• Sleeping with a gun under your pillow: +10
• Sleeping with a pillow under your gun: +100
• Biting a priest: +5
• Getting a Blow job whilst driving: +30
• Clearing a room with a fart... 20 points - 25 if you successfully blame it on someone else, but 30 for admitting it.
Entry is completely free so no excuses! You have until April 10th... may the best MAN win!
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